Film #325: THE GRAVES
1 out of 5 stars
*sigh* While I consider myself a fan of Bill Moseley, not even he can save this derivative and clichéd pseudo-horror film fiasco. I guess it was director Brian Pulido’s (of Chaos! Comics / EVIL ERNIE / LADY DEATH fame) intention to make a throw-back to late ‘70s / early ‘80s horror / gore films, but sadly his efforts fall short; WAY short. The film’s script is like a “greatest hits” of that era and that is so transparent as to be insulting. Two cute girls on a road trip? Check! Said girls venture to an out of the way tourist attraction and get stranded? Check! Wacky local minister (in this case played by a scenery gobbling Tony Todd)? Check! Some mumbo jumbo about a “smell” that comes from a local mine that “needs to be fed”? Check! Gratuitous use of bad metal music? Check! The most infuriating thing about THE GRAVES is that, for all its intentions of being a “gore” film, 90% of the kills happen off-camera with only some badly CGed blood splatters to mark their passing. Assorted characters stroll into the narrative SOLELY for the opportunity to be killed in short order a scene or two later. And through it all… Bill Moseley is there doing his usual best and “sellin’ it” like a pro. As I watched this, I was genuinely saddened that the man had to endure being in this. I just hope the stink of it didn’t cling to any of his clothing for too long. Frankly, a man of Moseley’s talent deserves better. Oh, and by the way… this is another flick brought to you by the After Dark Horror Fest.